Happy Friday! Today meet Lynette from Momisms – My Moments in Motherhood and mom of 3 boys!
Describe your sons.
Archie marches to the beat of his own drum. He is a crafty little guy always thinking about how to get out of work with minimal effort. His imagination is limitless in that everything he makes from Legos can blow stuff up.
Sean is just as smart as Archie and is a pleaser. Where his brother is opinionated and rolls over people with his ideas (just like his mother) Sean will fight for only what is really important. He loves details and can spend hours building complex lego aircraft, nijas and star wars stuff… all of which blow stuff up.
Oliver is the littlest dude in the house. He’s Opinionated with a captial O, he doesn’t even bother to argue, just shakes his head and says “Noooo Mommy/Daddy” as if to say “Silly little creatures, you think you can get me to do what YOU want? Hahaha, I laugh at you.” The easiest way to deal with him is to convince whatever you want him to do is HIS idea to begin with, or else there is no movement. He likes his kisses 1 at a time, no more than one.
How do you stay calm when surrounded by ALL that energy?
When things are good: all playing well together, Legos and train track building are the sport dejour.
When things are not good: Roughousing with only a minute until someone gets hurt and tears or a brawl breaks out. Distraction in the form of reading a story or playing a board-game works best.
When things are at the melting point: separate rooms for playing until they miss each other and actually WON’T spend all their time hitting each other, or a nap – for everyone (most especially mommy)
How do you instill gentlemanly behavior, actions, thoughts?
I make them open doors for me, require them to help each other, say please and thank you. I also really praise them when they do something thoughtful like picking weeds er.. flowers from the yard and bring them to me.
What do you like to do with your sons?
Love to play board games, Uno or read to them or watch them play at the park.
Where is your favorite place to shop for them?
Anywhere there is Legos or trains for toys. Children’s place for clothes. They tend to be sturdy and when I get the clearance deal, with a coupon and free shipping, I can’t beat the prices. For shoes – Nordstrom or The Rack.
How do you maintain close relationships with your sons as they age?
We are starting to run together. But I find listening to them spin their stories, and validate their thoughts and imagination as well as encourage their school work makes them feel like big important boys.
What type of sports or activities do they participate in?
Cross country for the older two. I’m still trying to convince the little one that movement is actually a good thing.
What are some books/series your sons like to read?
Harry Potter, Narnia, Superhero – superman/batman/green lantern, Star Wars for the older boys, and Thomas the Train for my younger son.
How do you handle violence in play? Some of this is normal “boy” behavior, but when do you feel it crosses the line? How do you guide them?
It crosses the line when someone gets hurt and retaliation starts. I can usually see it coming with they start getting hysterical in their laughter, almost like a maniacal laugh as they contemplate ways to hurt each other. The rest, I chalk it up to being a boy. The hardest thing was teaching them what they can do at home is a little different than what they allow at school.
If you have a fighter, how do you handle?
They all have their moments where they are going over the line. Whoever is continually instigating fights or discord gets separated from the group. The WORST punishment ever, according to them.
I didn’t take a picture because I was so mad. The twins were about 2 or 2 1/2 and it was a warm day. I let them play in the yard with the hose while I dashed inside to grab something.
By the time I came back – I swear it was only 2 minutes, they managed to stick the hose in the door of the detached garage, flooding it with inches of water. I lost boxes of clothes and books because they were soaked and a really big bag of cat food. I put them in the child-proofed house, while I swept out the garage.
I thought that was safe. Nope, I come back in and they have turned on the hot water in the tub (no cold) and were dumping everything they could get their hands on: baby books, toys, glass drinking glass, the garbage into the tub. They were soooo close to flooding the bathroom too. I put them in their room, which now only consisted of a bed and a dresser they couldn’t open while I cleaned up the mess.
With twins, I never did find a good way to contain them – it was easier to try and ‘rope off’ areas they shouldn’t be in. It worked until they learned how to work together, one standing on the other one, to get at things.
I love being a boy mom because ______
Boys are so different. I has taken years to realize that part of the reason boys are awesome is because they are different than I am. They think differently, act differently and are different in the way they relate to others. I have learned to appreciate and celebrate those differences.
Give us your best boy mom tip!
Also, be willing to stand up to ‘authority figures’ who want to tell you something about your kids. No kid is perfect, but there is usually a reason for your kids behavior. Maybe your boy needs more physical activity to keep him calm during the school day. Maybe he needs a nap, maybe he needs to eat more frequently. Don’t just accept it when someone says he is not behaving properly in a certain environment.
My twins have to share a birthday, so I try and make it special for them. But, I am a cheapskate at heart. I can’t fathom spending more than $100 on a birthday party, at that price point, its hard to also afford presents. The boys help pick a theme, and we try to center around that.
My favorite, DIY party on the cheap so far has been a firefighter birthday. I made a fire truck birthday cake (LOTS of red icing!) and we were lucky enough to live 4 blocks away from a fire station. We asked a few weeks before hand if we could have a tour, and the fire fighters were able to accommodate us. As long as they were not on a call, we could come by.
As children showed up to the party, they got a plastic firefighter hat and once gathered we walked over to the station. The firefighters were so amazing! They gave us a tour, pulled out the fire truck and let the kids use a small fire hose to shoot a target, and even called for birthday tones. If you don’t live near enough to a station, some stations have community rooms you can rent for an hour or so and you can have the party there!
On the way out of the party, I gave all the kids fingerprint safety cards I picked up at a health and safety fair. No dollar store toys, no candy in a goody bag, just a hat and a fingerprint card. The parents appreciated not having to take home stuff that would just be thrown away later, or candy that would make them climb the walls.
Thank you Lynette for letting me feature your family! You can also follow Lynette on twittter @TacomaLynette.
Don’t forget to read about the other boy moms and their little men!
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Thanks for reading!