Advice for Moms of Boys {from the other side}

One of my good friends, Joe {from an all boy family}, is always giving me advice on how to handle boys. He often tells me that the chaos, wrestling, gross dinner table talk, etc. will never stop. EVER.

Today I am letting him take over my blog almost like the “older version” of my boys looking back at me. Laughing at the funny things I’ve done and how they tortured me through the years.

I will laugh…one day {at least that is what Joe tells me}.

*************************************************************

First, let me start by saying I know Tina.  Not like, as a follower on Twitter knows someone…but like, I actually knew of her before I even knew her.

You see, I worked with her dad (a GREAT guy, I must say, with Fathers Day just passing).  I would see him at work, and we would talk about how he was coaching his daughters in softball, etc.  Then, I also started working with the guy who would eventually become Tina’s husband, my co-workers’ son-in-law, and one of my best friends in the world.

So, yeah, even though we see each other at birthday parties (and that is not nearly enough, but we are all so busy nowadays that we just deal with it), I always like to hang out with Tina and her family.

When we all first found out that baby #2 was another boy, I advised Tina that she would just have to suck it up and become a “mom of boys”.  You see, my mom was “without pink” way back in the 70′s, before the internet and blogs and all that (NOTE: It probably wouldn’t have mattered, since people of the 70′s were too busy having rad, tricked out vans and listening to disco to waste time twittering of writing blogs).  Life was a party.

Anyway, here is my “top 5 things to know” for all the moms without pink…

5.  At one point or another, you will find yourself chasing your boys around the backyard with a wiffle ball bat, looking to whoop up on someone.  Please, do not allow yourself to do this.  You will likely not catch them, and they will mock you the rest of your life for it.

4.  They will probably have their own reality of their childhood.  Let’s say you feed them Bologna and Cheese every day because THEY like it.  Well, when they get to be a little older, they will use this against you as well, blaming you for being cheap, etc.

3.  Don’t make the mistake of being at, let’s say, a basketball game and saying something like, “Go ask Mrs. Dick where the balls are.”  This is another source of ammo for later in life, when your boys will make this their facebook status, and laugh at least once a week.

2.   Accept that your boys will be dirty.  Sometimes this means looking like a slob at a family function (this was never me, but always my brother.)…or farting at the dinner table (again, my brother), or maybe just foul language at bad times (NEVER me).  You just have to let it roll, be flexible.  Put on some disco or do *whatever they did in the ’60′s or ’70′s to relax and chill.

1.  You have to realize that above all else, your boys love you more than anything.  They only have one mom.  And yes, it can kinda suck for you sometimes because we love to torture you…but when it really matters, they will be there for you, ready to battle.

Oh, and one last thing.  No matter how badly you wanted to have a girl, PLEASE, PLEASE…DO NOT design and sew a purple dance outfit and send your son to dance class…even if he says he wants to do it at the time.

Meet Tina @ Life Without Pink


2013 Family Expert for P&G's Have You Tried This Yet? Trend Trio, Tina is a mom of two active boys and the founder of Life Without Pink, a personal lifestyle blog focused on parenting, and raising boys to give other parents inspiration. You’ll find everything from cool gadgets, daily adventures, to personal stories and tips for raising boys. She's also the co-founder of Girls' Lunch Out {GLO}, a social media network that hosts events for women in social media and the Influencer Strategist for Socialstars by Crowdtap.

Comments

  1. says

    This is too funny!

    I can honestly say that I have done number 5 and it didn’t turn out well (for me). I’m trying to accept that my son will be forever dirty, but can someone please get him to stop torturing me with armpit farts?!
    Evonne´s last blog post ..Easy as 1, 2, 3…4?

  2. says

    Noted! Mine have done most of the things on the list and I can say that the older they get the more disgusting they become!! My 12 year old stands behind me (he’s my height) and pretends to spit in my hair. I always fall for it! Oh and the belching – repulsive!! They will battle for me though…. :)
    Kelly´s last blog post ..A few goals while we wait…

  3. says

    This is great, with two little boys I’m becoming more and more of a “boy mom” every day. I’m trying really hard to like the dirt and the wrestling and the poop-talk.
    Jessica´s last blog post ..The Hot Seat

    • says

      I know it is hard believe me…..I’ve trained my boys to take their shoes off when they walk in the door and now my oldest hates finger painting because he gets dirty. Great!

  4. says

    Awesome advice…
    Funny, sweet, and (from my limited experience so far) accurate.

    I was one of two girls. My mother was one of two girls. Her mother was one of five girls.
    There were no boys on the female side for three generations.

    So when I had a boy, I gulped. Hard. I didn’t know about pee on the toilet seat or scratching nuts (cough) or armpit farts.

    I’m still learning.
    And loving every minute of it.

    Of course, I did end up with a girl next.
    (poor thing.)

    :-)

  5. Chris says

    Joe, what a great blog…. knowing Joe and his family this was a really great chuckle. what your mom has put up with all these years…. Im taking that lady out for dinner!!! Great job Joe, you should consider joining the blogging world…..

  6. says

    I think this has made me even MORE scared than I initially was.

    Being a mom of boys, I’ve learned on thing: Boys. Never. Stop.

    I forgot that they’re going to make fun of me when I’m older, I really did feel like chasing my little one around the back yard with his plastic baseball bat today…but I didn’t. Phew.
    The Informal Martriarch´s last blog post ..Progressing Through Autism: The Dentist

  7. says

    This was great! I’m also a mom with boys and at least 5 times a week I think, wow, this is how boys are. I can’t be certain since I don’t have girls, but I’m thinking that girls don’t think it’s the best thing in the world to be naked. No I take that back, naked running around and around in circles around the living room yelling at the top of their lungs when you just want to get them dressed for the day :b
    Nikki O´s last blog post ..Storybook Land- Great Jersey Family Attraction!

  8. says

    Although I’m obviously no mom of boys, I totally think that Joe is onto something, Tina. If I were you, I’d take his advice. Just sayin’. ;)

  9. says

    oh that ‘s too funny. I’m a mom of a 6 y.o. litte boy and he’s enough to keep me on my toes all by himsel. He discovered a snakeskin in our backyard. He knows i’m TERRIFIED of snakes. that little bugger chased me with that thing so bad I had run across our street for refuge and yell to my husband for help.

    SaucyB’s last blog… S’more Please
    http://bit.ly/jeuiX8
    SaucyB´s last blog post ..(Mostly) Wordless Wednesday: S’mores

  10. says

    What a great post! As a mom of three boys it’s nice to see into the future a bit. I can relate to the feeling of wanting to (but never actually DOING IT) “whoop up on someone” with a whiffle bat. Especially when I catch them trying to pee behind our shrubs in the backyard, or trying to use eachother as target practice for thier ever changing karate moves when none of them have every taken karate. Thanks for the laugh!

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