Do you ever feel like that? I am very lucky to be able to stay home with my boys but I have to admit being home everyday all day makes me go a little insane at times.
I have two very wiry boys that never sit down for a minute. I often have to pry them off of my legs and I can not tell you how many times I trip over them {literally}.
Everyday seems the same; making food, cleaning up, wiping butts, listening to screaming, breaking up fights, ducking from being hit by thrown toys, cleaning up smooched food on the floor, changing outfits 3 times a day, chasing after nude boys and yelling “put on your clothes”, wiping up pee off the floor….the list goes on and on.
I love having a busy schedule because it keeps the kids happy and makes our day go faster. But if I don’t decide that we are going out from the minute I open up my eyes in the morning, I can never seem to get our act together.
It sometimes exhausts me thinking of getting the three of us ready to go out for the day….mostly because I have to chase down kids kicking and screaming to get changed.
It is hard at times to clear my head and think in midst of the chaos that I am always surrounded by. My mind feels like mush, numb.
When I finally get the chance to go out without the kids {which rarely happens} I realize that life is going on around me and I feel like I am standing still.
I feel alive just driving in my car with the windows down listening to my choice of music not having to deal with yelling, whining or the word “MOM” being called every five seconds.
It feels good.
I use to have help from family when I just had Big A…then came along Little B and it seems that some of them ran as far away from us as they could.
Why? Now with two kids, I need help more than ever. I feel bad for the boys who don’t get as much one on one time as they should with family. I feel bad for myself self pity that I can’t catch my breathe at times.
Everyone around me has jobs and things going on in their lives and at times I often feel like I have nothing. Don’t get me wrong I love being home with my boys and I am doing the hardest job I have ever had in my life but doesn’t a mom deserve a little break from time to time?
I often feel disconnected from the world and understand why moms put themselves last and let things that matter to them slip away.
The last few months I have been searching for a job {its something I need to do for our family} and I haven’t had any success. I try not to let this get me down but how can I not? I have a good background and yet I am still having trouble. At this point in my career, I want to find something that I am truly passionate about, I know what I want but it seems like a far out reach.
Sometimes this makes me feel like a failure. I know it may sound stupid to feel that way but I do. I use to have a great job and now I can’t find one!
Blogging has become a very important part of my life, a perfect outlet for me. There are many thoughts that go through my mind each day and I think “I am going to blog about that.”, but by the time I actually have a few minutes {usually around 9pm} to blog, I am so exhausted and I can’t seem to find the words I am looking for.
So here I am, actually getting a little peace and clearing my mind. One child is sleeping and the other is roaming around the house bored because I am not directly interacting with him {a little mom guilt}.
But I’m done having a pity party. It feels good to get it out and now that I did, I can move on. Today is a new day!
{ 52 comments… read them below or add one }
I know exactly how you feel. I’ve got 3 kids (4, 3 &1) and its a big production to go anywhere during the day. I also dont have a car during the day so we walk everywhere . I am lucky that my brother is close and he comes over often to entertain them with me (esp my son who LOVES guy time).
Glad you are getting some quiet today! I understand how important (and hard to find) that is. I never knew i would crave quiet before!
Hang in there for the job search – the perfect one will come up at the perfect time!
.-= Devan @ Accustomed Chaos´s last blog ..Can I Start Today Over? NO?! Seriously… =-.
Oh I don’t miss those days but I can tell you it WILL get better! So crank the music and enjoy when you can and just as you think you cant take it any more, they are grown ups and you will miss the hectic days.
Happy Follow Friday and nice to meet you. Stop by my blog and say hello!
http://herroyaljoaness.blogspot.com/
.-= Joan Penfold´s last blog ..B&B Savannah Georgia =-.
Devan, thanks so much for the encouragement! It means a lot to have people stop by and make you feel better. I have decided to brave it and take my two kids out to lunch today. Just me and the boys
I go out to lunch with my kids way too often for our budget just to 1. leave the house 2. avoid cooking 3. avoid post-lunch clean up LOL
It totally keeps my sanity to get out into the real world though, even if it takes a bit to get everyone out the door.
I’ll usually wander around Target or something too while I’m out… I call it exercise
.-= Jayme´s last blog ..Ebeanstalk.com- Toy Review =-.
Hey! Found you on Friday Follow. I stayed home with my son for 12 years. It was easily the hardest years of my life. I now have a job….Its harder and easier. Easier on my brain that’s for sure. It is REALLY REALLLLLLYYY hard being a SAHM. So good luck finding a job and staying sane in the process!:)
Kari
.-= Kari´s last blog ..Junk Collecting =-.
Honey, I could write this post… almost every single day.
With five boys, a husband that works a lot of hours, and the closest family living an hour away, I feel like I have lost myself many many days. I do not recognize the woman in the mirror.
Blogging is my therapy! It is my outlet as well.
You know what is helping me… doing my Simple Abundance journey (which I have a section on my blog dedicated to) and acknowledging the things I am grateful for everyday. Even if it is the simplest things I am grateful for it gives me the motivation to press ahead.
And then when all the kids are fast asleep and I see their peaceful faces, I feel guilt too. For yelling, losing my cool, being short, not giving every child the attention they deserve…. Mommy’s could drown themselves in guilt. I think it is our nature.
Hang in there! Check out my Simple Abundance section on my blog!
I’m a stay at home mom too and I TOTALLY know how you feel. I actually JUST got off the phone with my husband asking if there was ANY way possible for him to come home early so I can run errands sans tagalongs before his parents get here. Sometimes we really just need that alone time!
BTW, I found you via Friday follow & look forward to reading your blog!
.-= Jessie´s last blog .. =-.
hey! i remember i met u via FF you on twitter today! Now i’ m here via Friday Follow for my new blog-
becuase {family} life is not always…
.-= mrs. parker´s last blog ..UNDER CONSTRUCTION! AND TWO CHANCES TO WIN BIG… =-.
I had to comment on this… You know, grass is greener and what not.
I mean, I know where you are coming from and I know it is hard when you feel like “All you do” is take care of… Everything.
But it’s more important than Anything.
Still, you need to take care of you.
Enjoy this time… Cherish the moments of clarity you have when you’re enjoying your “self” and put on the music YOU want to listen to every once in a while.
After all, you are in the driver’s seat.
.-= erica´s last blog ..My Bon Jovi Story: Part 1 =-.
Oh goodness, I feel like this often and I only have one child! It’s always nice to see that others are going through the same (or, at the very least, similar) things we are, isn’t it? I really like your blog! I found you via FF, and I’ll be back
.-= Krystal´s last blog ..Friday Follow! =-.
Honestly I could have written this post because I know exactly how you feel. I do work full-time but I am able to flex my schedule so I am home thursday days and fridays. But if I do not have those days planned I feel like I am ready to pull my hair out by noon. And when I am at work sometimes all I can think about are my kids and what they are doing. It is hard. I will be at meeting totally unfocused.
With a getting job just stay confident and keep at it. I know it is hard but you will find something. You know you have what it takes!
**hugs**
.-= This Mama Works It!´s last blog ..The Importance of Building Your Brand and Sticking to It =-.
Found you at Friday Follow. When my boys were young and in pre-school I did alot of playdates. They were so much fun. I have 4 boys and 1 girl.
Have a great weekend.
Happy Friday Follow
I am a new follower, looking forward to reading your blog
.-= dymphna´s last blog .. =-.
Here from FF! I think all of us moms feel this from one time to another. My youngest will start full time school in three years, and I’m finding myself at a point where I don’t exactly know what to do when she’s in school. It’s a weird feeling, that’s for sure. Be sure to take time for yourself, though, because if Mommy’s not taking care of herself, she can’t take care of other people!
.-= Ethan, Zach, and Emma’s Mom´s last blog ..Friday Follow =-.
Ladies, you are awesome! Thank you for making me feel better and that I am totally not going insane! I know we all have our struggles {I guess we wouldn’t be human if we didn’t} but sometimes I guess you just need to get it out. I know for me it made me feel better and having each of you come by and share your advice made my day
Oh and Joan – yes you are right. I always think how one day I know I will miss this and wish I could go back for a moment to enjoy them as they are little. I have to keep remembering that.
Ethan, Zach, and Emma’s Mom – what’s the saying “happy mom = happy family”???
Visiting from friday follow, I am your newest follower.
Hop on over and say Hi…
http://www.lifeofamodernmom.com
Tina I know first hand that you are an incredible mother and friend. This is just a phase in your life that is challenging yet rewarding at the same time. Remember our very first event, the speaker told me to look for the good in the moment when you feel overwhelmed. This exercised has helped me tremendously. You overlook the chaos around you and find something positive that gets you through. The job will come in time. Don’t give up. You will have everything you every wanted when you least expect it.
Just take a deep breath and stare out the nearest window for a minute and Life will slow down. I do this every hour, every day. That and I blare MY music in the car and have the sunroof open as much as I can. It helps keep me sane! Hang in there!
.-= Katie´s last blog ..Feel Good Friday =-.
This is a very honest post that I totally relate to. Have a great Saturday – take a moment for yourself. You deserve it.
.-= Sarah @ For the Love of Naps´s last blog ..It. is. Time. =-.
Stopping by to say Hi and Happy Follow Friday! Now following you!
I have a whole bunch of giveaways going on if you wanted to check them out!
Visit Mama’s Money Savers
Takes so much more time with kids but so worth it…hang in there I have my days too
Here from FF
Take a minute to check out my blog
I Have a Misikko Hana flat Iron Giveaway Going over 100 dollar package and other giveaways also
ethertonphotography.blogspot.com
Honey, can I relate! I LOVE being home with my baby and I’m lucky that we are financially at a place where I can do that, but there are days (today was one of them!) where I think “can I please just pee without someone hollering for me?!?”
My husband has next week off from work and he offered to put me up in a hotel for a day so I could have 24 hours all to myself. And I said no. (I know, am I crazy???)
The thing is, in a way it sounds like heaven, but in another way I know I would miss my little guy. It’s such a paradox, isn’t it? We love them, we want our space. Someone offers us space, we feel guilty. Ahhh, the joys of being a mom!
.-= Lucy´s last blog ..Things I Love Thursday: Blogs by Sneaky Momma =-.
I’m your newest follower from FF! Have a great weekend. Followbacks are appreciated.
Lindsey
http://babyinthebigcity.blogspot.com
Thanks for coming by! I will be over to check out your blog as well.
.-= Tina @ Life Without Pink´s last blog ..The World Is Moving While I am Standing Still =-.
I found you through 6 degrees of blogging… actually i found the Otherhood and then found you through that!! so strange! anywho, following you now!!
Julia
http://www.workwifemomlife.com
.-= Julia´s last blog ..6 Degrees of Blogging: March 27 =-.
I feel exactly the the same way! You’re honest. Loved your post! My son is my only child. My hubby works long hours. He has to . Because I don’t have a job right now. Blogging is my outlet. And I like that Crystal said’ blogging is is my therapy!’ That’s true! I also earned some money but not enough. Still looking for alternatives. Glad you had some time for yourself.
I’m officially following now;)
.-= yonca´s last blog ..Fresh Wave Green Home Kit Review =-.
Yonca – thanks so much for stopping by. I know some days are tough but I am trying to remember that one day I will miss it all
I stay at home with 2 boys and I too feel like going crazy more times then I can count…so you are not alone. I felt more organized when I worked full time, not sure what happen after # 2 came into my life. Slowly but surely I feel as if I am getting back on track and #2 is almost 3 years old. So don’t beat yourself up and get away when you can. My husband at times will ask me to go away for the weekend because he thinks I need it and WE DO and WE DESERVE it!!!
Thanks Trina…yeah I know it will be better {probably when they are both in school, haha}. I am hoping with the nice weather that it will make it so much better being able to get outside!
**hugs**
I have had days just like you are describing. For me it was worse when my Hubs was gone for either a deployment or a temp assignment. Now that my kids are older, things have gotten a tad easier.
My hubby rocks because he can usually tell when I just need a break and he will tell me to “go out for ‘you’ time”. I go out for a couple hours and it rejuvenates me. Now that my kids are in school full time I get my alone time during the day. I try and pick one day a week where I do anything I want. The other days are for things around the house (cleaning, laundry, etc.), appointments for my boys or myself, house errands, and such. I think by doing this it helps me feel a little more focused.
I hope you have a good weekend. *huge cyber hugs*
.-= Niki @ Ambitious Gurl´s last blog ..Catching back up…. =-.
Yeah guess I can’t complain when I hear about hubby’s being deployed, etc. This week was so nice, my hubby was home the entire time and I got to relax a bit
Hi there!
I’m in a life without pink as well! I’ve got 2 boys (nearly 2 and nearly 5)
One thing that helps get me through the long days/weeks is getting up just a bit earlier than the rest of the family – it helps get my mind/heart settled before the rush of activity and over-all ‘neediness’ that these wonderful little people seem to exude all the day long.
Also, knowing I’ll have a morning set aside just for ME helps me to more readily engage all the other days/hours in-between. Both my guys are either in preschool or a mothers day out program on Thursdays which means I get 3 beautiful hours to do whatever I like once a week (no cleaning or grocery shopping allowed!!)
Do you have anything like that in your area? If not, you could look into arranging a child care trade with another mama in your area.
Getting time to re-fuel is so important.
And, as for the words escaping you by the time you can sit down to blog – I know just what you mean. I invested a dollar in a little pocket note book that I can jot things down in whenever the muse strikes.
Visiting from SITS – hope you have a wonderful day!!
Thanks for coming by! Great tips. My oldest has preschool 2 days a week but my 17 month old is home with me all day. But that is a great idea about switching off with a friend. Just having a few hours to myself to do what I want is so refreshing!
I know exactly how you feel! I’m a stay at home mom of three boys (12 yrs & 6 yr old twins). I had always worked up until I was pregnant with the twins. Once I became a stay at home mom I felt exactly as you. I guess I still do at times! Don’t get me wrong…I wouldn’t change it for the world! I also had a lot of help with my first son & like you, the twins arrived & I’m wondering (aside from hubby) where did that help go? So, don’t feel alone! There is no pink here either! Thank you for posting! It’s nice to know someone else has the same feelings! Dropping by from SITS!
Wow when I look at moms with more than 2 kids I think they are Super Women {especially with all boys}
Yeah not sure why family disappears when you have more than 1…oh well their loss!
.-= Tina @ Life Without Pink´s last blog ..A Few Must Have Blogging Tools =-.
Being a mom is such an interesting thing. It’s easy to feel like you have “lost” yourself to your children, your home and your responsibilities. We all know the work, time and effort put into parenting is worth it, but some time to take care of yourself is so important too.
.-= Catherine @ Evolving Mommy´s last blog ..Thin Wheat Crackers =-.
Very true…it is the best job I ever had…hardest too but worth it. I am not good at asking for help or giving myself a break, but I should more often. I know they wont be little for too much longer and I will miss these days. I already look at my 17 month old and want to cry because he isn’t a baby anymore
.-= Tina @ Life Without Pink´s last blog ..A Few Must Have Blogging Tools =-.
I just have to say that I could have perfectly written this post myself except that I am not a stay at home mom, but I totally feel the same way. Although I am not home with Lauren 24/7 I feel like I have no time for me. If I am not at work I am home with her doing all the mommy stuff and taking care of the house, the bills, the groceries, the dog and the list goes on and on and on.
Is there a mom’s day out group that you could join so that you can have a little time away from the kid’s? Or how about enlisting your hubby to help one night a week or on the weekends so you can have some time for yourself? I tend to get stressed out really easily and right now I am pregnant and that seems to make it worse. I finally told my husband how I was feeling and we have been able to work out some things.
.-= Sonya´s last blog ..Happy 1st Birthday Madeline =-.
Actually we do a lot of play dates…probably 2 – 3 a week which is a life saver. However now my almost 4 yr old is into crying when he leaves people’s houses because he wants to take their toys with him, ugh. My hubby works crazy hours but you are right I should take one night and go out…he would never have a problem with this. It is more me. By 7pm I am beat!
.-= Tina @ Life Without Pink´s last blog ..A Few Must Have Blogging Tools =-.
You said it! I have been going through a very similar situation. I am a SAHM of 2 wild and crazy girls. The oldest will be 6 this month and the youngest is 18 months.
They keep me on my toes. a few weeks ago I kept say “I swear if I step on another Cherio I am gonna scream”, well I screamed. My husband works out of town and is home for a few days and then gone for a few weeks, so now that I have stumbled into the blogging world it has been a great outlet for me.
We also had ALOT of help with the 1st and then when the 2nd was born everyone ran away as fast as they could!(not literlly, but thats what it seemed like). It was like not even an option for me to go back to work after the 2nd because of the outragous cost of daycare. I am getting better adjusted now with the simple life.
Thanks so much for posting this it has helped me realize I’m not the only one!
Wow I give you credit. That’s a lot with your husband being away. My hubby works alot of overtime and that is hard enough. Yes blogging has helped me so much to connect with others. I look forward to following you as well!
.-= Tina @ Life Without Pink´s last blog ..Welcome To My Party =-.
Very interesting post..Iam really much appreciated through reading your..this post offers provided a useful info..Many thanks for the actual info given..
I am SO excited you are being featured on SITS today. Well deserved!!
This is a great post and I think just about EVERY mom feels this way in some capacity at some point or another. You know I’m a newbie at being a SAHM too. The first week I was all ga ga for spending time with my kid, but now that we’re 2 months in, I can say this is just as hard as being at my job, just in different ways. I think being with this kid almost all day long has aged me 5 years in two months. lol
I’m big on MAKING people let you have time for yourself. If you don’t take care of you no one else will. Maybe that’s the only child in me coming out, or just the bitch.
Enjoy your day in the spotlight sweetie!
Nicely put girl! I feel as if I live under a rock sometimes.
Crystal
http://survivingandthrivinginmom-dom.blogspot.com
.-= Crystal´s last blog ..To Grandma With Love =-.
Stopping by from SITS! Love your blog
I often times feel like this and I don’t even have kids yet! I think anything that can take up the majority of your day/life makes us feel like everyone else is having all the fun. I totally know where you are coming from
Look forward to reading more!
.-= Mimi´s last blog ..Irresistible Must Dos – In the Fall =-.
I know how you feel! Leaving my job to raise my son was the hardest decision i ever made. It’s the most thankless job but the best one I have ever had!
As tempting as it is to try to make the day go by faster, I always stop myself. The Babby will only be a baby for so long, and even if it’s sometimes a little boring or not as clean as it should be or means working into the night (I work at home, naptimes and nighttimes) I try to let things go by as slow as possible. I’m too scared not to!
.-= Christa aka BabbyMama´s last blog ..Bye Bye- Bink! =-.
Did you ever find a job? I think you are still at home with your boys right?
I enjoy being a nanny and having the flexibility and time I have with my kids but I do get jealous when I hear about other people I know and their exciting or successful careers. Oh well, that is life. I’ll have time in the future to pursue my interests, for now I am happy being a mom.
I hear ya!! I’m so grateful for each new day… it’s a new opportunity to get my act together, and to hopefully have enough energy at the end of the day to write about it!! Haha.
.-= Tabitha Blue´s last blog ..today- october 14 =-.
Oh, honey. BEEN there. Thank goodness our kids give us a do-over each day!
thats sounds like me. i can totally relate..it always feels like the hubby is doing everything else but all i have to do is take care of the house n kids and i feel like i cant even do that. lately i been snappin at the kids for being too hyper..itll get better. one day at a time..
.-= marjnhomer´s last blog ..top ten tuesday =-.
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